Night #1 of crying myself to sleep. I miss him already. Come home soon
teendisasterr: i wish i was one of those girls who thought they were ugly but are actually really pretty but instead i’m one of those girls who thinks they’re ugly and is actually ugly
twistedviper: whorusszahhak: perfectionistdia: whorusszahhak: don’t ever take me on a date to an aquarium because i will ignore you and spend the whole time looking at the fish But, if you think about it, that’s all the more reason to go. The person you’re dating gets to sit back and watch you smile and have fun. All the while, he/she’s falling deeper in love with you. thatS REALLY...
lately ive been noticing a lot of girls have awful self esteem and body image issues, i want to try an experiment. reblog this if you feel negatively about yourself in any way.
store guy: /extensively stares at boobs
me: yes, hello, i'm here because my mobile's not working. also if you could please stop looking at my breasts?
store guy: oh my god i wasn't looking at your breasts! - i mean, that, too, but... /slowly unbuttons shirt
me: ... why are you taking your shirt off now
store guy: /dramatically opens shirt to reveal iron man tee
me: /looks down at her captain america tee
store guy: /happy seal-clapping
me: oh my god we match
store guy: if we can't repair your phone, you can be damn sure we'll avenge it!
benedictcuddlebach: at-boundary-conditions: what if humans have cheat codes like if you jump 14 times and then punch + kick ok awesome now i can walk on water and do calculus my fiancee read this he’s jumping right now oh god i hope it works
kanyewesticle: MY GRANDMA ASKED FOR A BLOWJOB AT THE SALON INSTEAD OF A BLOWDRY
fullmetaltail: smokinghotcronus: acciolawrences: Do you realize our handwriting is like our own personal font I’m sorry for unintentionally creating a font worse than Comic Sans.
lol-drugged: pityreblogs: so my brother put up this barbed wire about a year ago and my dad sent him a text that said “the barbed wire you put up at bennett still looks good it’s even a weave catcher” and we were like what the hell does that mean he’s lost his mind… then he sent this apparently some girl tried to jump the fence and her weave got stuck in the barbed wire Was anyone else...
gamsee: my grandma asked me what i want for my birthday so i said all i want for my birthday is a big booty ho and she said that im making jesus sad
do you ever just wanna kinda pack up and leave out of the blue without saying anything to anyone like just leave and start a new life thousands of miles away because i think i would love to do that wow
how do i get a flat stomach by tomorrow
"Why are you single?"
laugh-addict: I don’t know, ask all the people that won’t date me.